CALL ME OUT MEME

[hurf_durf]

The fancy table I had here before was woefully out of date and I'm too lazy to update the code! So instead, here is my muselist! Anyone currently listed as being played in a game or in the 'Homeless/Memes/Museboxes' section is fair game for threading.

Instructions:
1) Leave a top-level comment with the name of one of my muses and a thread starter.

2) PM me to let me know you did that, since I don't get notifs for new comments to this post.

3) Let the pretendy funtimes begin!

Comments

[fencefatale]

— Huh?

[What kind of question is that? But, she'll answer it nonetheless. It's not like it's a horrible question, such as "What are your three sizes?"]

Actually, yes. I do.

[pygmalion_perv]

If I gave you this, would you consider tying it back in a ponytail?

[He holds out a red ribbon made of shimmering fabric. It's actually a fairly high level defensive accessory with some decent stat-boosting enchantments on it.]

[fencefatale]

Wait. You're giving this to me for free?

[She's certainly shocked, but she's certainly not all that surprised. After all, a lot of people have confessed to her in the past. Though the ribbon does have good stats...]

[pygmalion_perv]

As long as you'll use it, sure! It took me a while to get it.

[Which is probably an impressive claim in and of itself, considering this guy seems to be a barefisted combat specialist judging by his own equipment.]

[fencefatale]

Wow.

[Asuna smiles, completely forgetting that she had just died a few moments before.]

I'd be glad to accept your gift, um...

[pygmalion_perv]

Hachibe Maeda, age 15, at your service!

[All bright smiles over here.]

[fencefatale]

You're younger than me?

[Go figure. Why is that all the guys who crush on her are years younger than she is?]

[pygmalion_perv]

Huh? Well, yeah, I guess. Is that a problem?

[fencefatale]

No... no, not at all. It's just funny.

[pygmalion_perv]

So you'll take it, right?

[fencefatale]

[She gives him a warm smile and decides to accept his offer.]

Yeah, I will. Thanks.

[pygmalion_perv]

Great! I can't wait to see how it looks on you!

[He eagerly hands it over!]

[fencefatale]

[After pressing the okay button (technically, a circle) to accept, she scrolls through her items, rearranging some things before finally equipping the item.]

Well? It's not weird looking or anything, is it?

[pygmalion_perv]

No, it's amazing! It looks incredible on you!

[Just... this face now. Blushing and far too enthusiastic over a simple ribbon, even if it does have amazing stats. He's circling around to the side to get a look in profile.]

[fencefatale]

[Asuna will stare in shock for a few moments before regaining her composure. It's just a ribbon, dude. Get over it.]

Ahaha... thanks.

[pygmalion_perv]

Yes, this is it! This is definitely it! I'm so happy!

[fencefatale]

W-... what's definitely it?

[If the game allowed her to put question marks over her head, there would be so many right now.]

[pygmalion_perv]

Your ears! I knew it!

[fencefatale]

My... ears?

[Is there something wrong with her ears? Other than the fact that she's wearing purple earrings.]

[pygmalion_perv]

Yeah! They're beautiful! So beautiful that you don't even need those earrings at all to make them look cute - they're incredible all on their own! That graceful curvature... and I bet they're soft like marshmallows, too!

[fencefatale]

[Asuna immediately takes a step back, covering her ears with her hands. She's completely embarrassed and unsure whether to laugh, cry, blush, or hit this idiot with the handle of her sword.]

[pygmalion_perv]

No, don't be embarrassed! I didn't mean it like that!

[fencefatale]

Then explain.

[She'll take out her rapier and point it directly at him. She's not going to kill him (she could never do such a thing), but she can damage him pretty badly.]

[pygmalion_perv]

I saw you a few towns back sitting and relaxing by a fountain enjoying the breeze, and you brushed your hair back over your ear... it was just for a moment, but I knew for sure right then and there that yours were the ears I've been looking for my whole life! After that, I set out on a solo quest to find the best ribbon in the game to accentuate their beauty in hopes that I'd find you again someday so I could give it to you. I can't even tell you how many times I almost died trying to get it to drop. But I finally got it, and I just ran into you again here - it's like fate! Here you are, right in front of me, wearing the ribbon I worked so hard to get for you... and you look absolutely radiant!

[For what it's worth, he seems both sincere and completely unafraid of the rapier.]

[fencefatale]

[Asuna puts away the rapier, staring him down for several moments before laughing. She honestly cannot believe someone (at least, someone other than Kirito) would go to such lengths for her. Honestly, most people in the game hardly even go solo anymore.]